Kindness is more important than wisdom, and the recognition of this is the beginning of wisdom. - Theodore Isaac Rubin

Monday, October 1, 2007

Love... The Best Invention Ever

Kitten Rescue, Old Lady Rescue, and most importantly, MY RESCUE :)

After going through the worst depression of my life, I now feel better than I ever have. Yesterday I was watching my wonderful boyfriend's softball game and just felt like I came to this new realization of what life is about. The sun was beating down on me but a gentle (but dusty) breeze was blowing and I looked over at him on first base. He has this new hair-do, his first faux-hawk :), which he dyed blue for the Cubs making the playoffs and he is getting so much shit for it. He gave me the cutest smile that just said 'I freaking love you.' It made me so happy even though I knew that game would be the last day of the year that I'm not complaining how cold it is. I love how he is so fun, different, and spontaneous and I completely admire how he doesn't care what anyone thinks about him - something I am slowly learning from. I have never felt anything so powerful before.
There were several people there for me while I was going through this horrible depression. I am so lucky that he was SOOO patient with me every day. Now that I am better, our relationship is actually stronger than before I got so sad (we've been together 4 years). That is real love, for better or worse, without the marriage yet. We even made it through me going away for 2 1/2 years to college and only seeing eachother on weekends - impressive for a man, especially a man his age! So I know he is the one I will marry because I know he will be there no matter what. I would not be the person I am today without him. I used to view life as pretty much a hassle but now it feels like such a gift.
I have thoroughly analyzed life and who I am and have a wonderful 1-year plan that makes me look at my current (personal and financial) situation in a much better light. My life already was the best it had been in a long time but it just took me a while to appreciate that.
Last night, I kissed him good night and we both smiled. I turned over and watched the lightning light up the sky while he ran his fingers along my bare skin (it helps me sleep) and I fell asleep with a smile on my face. I don't remember the last time that that happened but it was a great feeling and from what I can tell a big turning point.
That is what life is about - finding someone that really is your better half.. Someone you can tell anything and never judges you. Jono - I freaking love you and we have a great life ahead of us!